a dream

Just yesterday morning I awoke in my own bed. I was alone but it was warm.

Today I find myself awake in what looks like a deep hole?

I can’t move anything except for my eyes. I strain to look around. This hole is in the shape of a rectangle. It looks like I am about 5 to 6 feet under. Wait, wait! This looks like a grave! My grave! I catch my breath. This can’t be right, this must be a dream. OK is this is a dream why do I feel so cold right now. Why am I wearing a suite. I never wear suites.

OK, don’t panic. “I am in my own grave, IN MY OWN GRAVE!!!!!”, “HELP ME!!!” I’m not dead. I yell this but my mouth is not moving. At least I don’t think it is.

Calm down.

I am not hearing anything. Just silence.

It seems to be a nice day out, I see blue skies. If this was real I would be hearing thnings, yet I hear nothing. No birds singing. No cars, buses, trucks. Nothing but complete silence.

What happened?

How did I get here?

Why am I here?

I don’t remember.

Wait! Listen, I hear something now and it sounds like voices. They are faint but seem to be getting closer. I now strain my eyes to see if I can hear who it is and what they are saying. The voices seem familiar. I first here the sound of my mothers voice. Then I hear my wife. Why are they talking, they don’t like each other. I try harder to hear. I start yelling to them, “Help me! Please help me! There was some kind of mistake!”. I listen. They cannot hear me. I listen harder and now I can make out what they are saying. “I am sorry Shirley but at the end there was nothing we could do for him”. 

At the end?

Oh my God! I finally did it! When? How? I don’t remember what happened.

I now hear my daughters voice. Oh my God what did I do to her?

“Mommy? Do I just grab a handful of this dirt and throw it on Daddy?”

“Yes dear. Say a prayer for your father so he can finally be at peace and out of his pain”.

The dirt landed on my face and covered my eyes. I had to close them.

Was this the last thing I would ever hear. Will there be any place to rest or am I just going to lie here for eternity?